Other peoples issues

When you lose a child, you become painfully aware that other people's problems are so petty. Nothing can compare to the loss of a child.  Then, as you are grieving the loss of your beloved baby, you are stuck having to listen to nonsense. Most other people just don't get it... After one...maybe two months have passed, most people feel your grief should be winding down. They feel they can again approach you with their petty issues and problems. Or, tell you how you are acting too depressed, too weepy, might need medication etc. You as the bereaved parent are then stuck thinking about telling them the truth about their lack of support, lack of empathy, lack of common sense. Another friend in grief gave me the idea to "write a letter" to someone who was showing lack of support and really tell them how I felt. I mean REALLY tell them how I felt.  Then rip up the letter. It was very helpful, especially to write a letter to someone I knew would never get it and who it would be a waste of my energy trying to share with. It was so helpful to get the anger and resentment out of my head and heart.
The truth is, unless someone has lost a child, they can never truly understand the depth of your loss. A blessed few can be supportive and helpful. The rest..... not so much.

I stumbled across this post from another blogger and it really sums up how I felt and often times still feel six and a half years later.
http://www.glowinthewoods.com/home/2011/1/17/correspondence.html

HANDS Meeting Cancellation 1/12/11

Our HANDS support group meeting scheduled for Janurary 12, 2011 has been cancelled due to a state of emergency in Dutchess County. Please do not venture out during the storm. We will be back next week at our usual time and place.