Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Fear

After the loss of a pregnancy, your dream of becoming a parent has been shattered.  After the dust settles, and you begin to think about trying again, you hit a wall of fear. The fear of not being able to get pregnant  again. The fear of getting pregnant and the same thing happening again. The fear of getting pregnant and something different happening. The fear can be totally irrational and all consuming, but because you have lost a child, you know, what you fear can be a reality.  Fear is normal, we have experienced the worst thing to ever happen. When you have experienced heartbreak of that magnitude, it has lasting effects. Others try to be helpful and tell us to "think positively" and "be hopeful", but that is not easy. Taking it day by day, sometimes minute by minute is how I did it.  During my two subsequent pregnancies, there were days I didn't think I would make it. I didn't think I had the strength. Looking back now, I realize, the strength of a bereaved parent is almost infinite. We live. There is nothing harder to do than live while our children do not. We hardly ever give ourselves that credit. Everyday we climb the mountain of life after the loss of a child.  We owe it to ourselves and to our precious children to pursue our dream of parenthood. Our children are our most precious treasure and I truly believe they would want us to live life just as if they had been able to live with us.

http://miscarriage.about.com/od/tryingagainafterloss/tp/decidingwhentotryagain.htm

http://www.sidelines.org/

http://www.glowinthewoods.com/ttc-pregnancy-birth/

Thursday, June 10, 2010

More Support Websites

Here are a few more website that have been of some help to myself and others. I would encourage searching yourself, with the advice to include "support" in the search engine. There are a lot of sites out there, many of which may be to sad or too shocking. Sticking with some of the bigger more well known sites might steer you in a more helpful direction.

www.earlyangels.com

www.bornangels.com/

http://community.babycenter.com/groups/a15155/miscarriage_stillbirth_infant_loss

http://forums.about.com/n/pfx/forum.aspx?folderId=1&listMode=13&nav=messages&webtag=ab-miscarriage

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Support Groups

One of the best ways to deal with the grief of losing a child is to speak with other bereaved parents. Only another bereaved parent can truly understand what life is like without your child. Going to local support group meetings can be a way to minimize the isolated feeling sometimes felt. It can also be a great way to create a supportive network for yourself to share the difficult feelings and  emotions. We sometimes keep our feelings and thoughts hidden from our other friends and family, for fear they will make hurtful statements or think we are going crazy. Sometimes a local support groups might not work because of other obligations. This is where online support can come in. Many bereaved parents reach out online as a way to cope with their grief. There are tons of very helpful groups that can be found after a bit of looking. Below are just five of thousands. There is help our there in so many forms....You are not alone.


http://www.missfoundation.org/forums/

http://www.compassionatefriends.org/home.aspx

http://babylossandhealing.com/forums/

http://hygeiafoundation.org/form1.htm

http://www.inciid.org/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=29